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Harav Hagaon Yehuda Wagshal Shlita

In Rochel’s Merit

Parshas Vayeitzei

Harav Hagaon Meir Wahrsager shlita

Rebuilding to the Initial Spark

Parashas Vayeitzei

Harav Hagaon Yehuda Wagshal Shlita

There’s a certain struggle that’s very well known to ovdei Hashem. Very often, especially at the time of a new beginning – a new zman, Rosh Hashanah, or any new period in a person’s life – a person experiences a great hisorerus to improve in his ruchniyus, and he resolves to make a serious change in his life, whether it’s in his learning, his davening, his shemiras hamitzvos, or his bein adam lachaveiro. Immediately after he makes this decision, he goes on to fulfill his kabbalah with energy and cheishek, and baruch Hashem it works. But then, all too often, sooner than later that initial desire wears off, and the person might find himself struggling to maintain the level of the kabbalos he committed to. Practically all ovdei Hashem have experienced this struggle: they started something with tremendous cheishek, and then the energy wore off.

I think it’s important to understand why this struggle happens, in order to be able to deal with it better. And I believe that the root of this struggle is alluded to in this week’s parashah.

Twice in the parashah we find that Yaakov Avinu is accompanied by malachim – at the beginning of the parashah and at the end. Both times, there is discussion about the two types of malachim that accompanied him: malachim of Eretz Yisrael, and malachim of chutz laaretz. At the beginning of the parashah, when Yaakov Avinu was leaving Eretz Yisrael for chutz laaretz, the malachim switched, and the malachim of Eretz Yisrael were replaced by the malachim of chutz laaretz. And at the end of the parashah, when Yaakov was returning to Eretz Yisrael, the malachim of chutz laaretz left and were replaced by the malachim of Eretz Yisrael.

The Shem Mishmuel notes that there’s a slight difference between the switching of the malachim at the beginning of the parashah and the switching of the malachim at the end of the parashah. At the beginning of the parashah the Torah says:וְהִנֵּה סֻלָּם מֻצָּב אַרְצָה וְרֹאשׁוֹ מַגִּיעַ הַשָּׁמָיְמָה וְהִנֵּה מַלְאֲכֵי אֱלֹקִים עֹלִים וְיֹרְדִים בּוֹ, and Rashi comments: עולים תחלה ואחר כך יורדים – first the malachim of Eretz Yisrael went up, and then the malachim of chutz laaretz came down. Rashi makes it sound as though the two groups of malachim never overlapped. At the end of the parashah, however, when Yaakov Avinu was returning to Eretz Yisrael, the passuk says: וַיִּקְרָא שֵׁם הַמָּקוֹם הַהוּא מַחֲנָיִם – Yaakov called the place “Machanayim,” referring to the two machanos of malachim. Rashi comments that even before he left chutz laaretz, the malachim of Eretz Yisrael came to greet him in chutz laaretz and accompany him into Eretz Yisrael. Apparently, then, the two camps of malachim did overlap upon Yaakov’s return, but when he left there was a moment when he was left without any malachim.

 

Greater than the Malachim

The Shem Mishmuel explains the significance of this distinction. Yaakov Avinu, he says, was actually greater than the malachim. We know this from next week’s parashah, where the Torah describes the battle between Yaakov and the Sar of Eisav. Yaakov Avinu was left all by himself, yet he was able to overcome the Sar of Eisav, as the passuk says: כִּי שָׂרִיתָ עִם אֱלֹהִים וְעִם אֲנָשִׁים וַתּוּכָל. If so, then Yaakov didn’t really need the protection of malachim. Why, then, did these camps of malachim accompany him?

The answer is that only after Yaakov Avinu reached his highest madreigah, the madreigah of וַיִּוָּתֵר יַעֲקֹב לְבַדּוֹ, did he become greater than the malachim. Earlier in his life, however, he was not yet on that level, and he therefore required the protection of malachim.

We often find, says the Shem Mishmuel, that at the beginning of a period or process, all the potential is evident right away, and only later does the potential fade and the work of bringing the potential מן הכח אל הפועל start. For example, we know that Hakadosh Baruch Hu created the world in six days, but Rashi says, in Parashas Bereishis, that really everything was created on the first day, when Hashem created אֵת הַשָּׁמַיִם וְאֵת הָאָרֶץ. Throughout the six days of Creation, everything had to emerge מן הכח אל הפועל.

In a similar vein, Chazal teach that when a baby is inside its mother, a malach teaches him the entire Torah, and then, just before birth, the malach taps him and causes him to forget all that he has learned. Then, he has to relearn all of the Torah in this world. What is the purpose of that? Because every beginning holds the potential of all the greatness that can come later. Hashem gives the child, as a gift, all of his potential growth in Torah, and then it’s taken away from him and he has to regain it throughout his life.

Likewise, says the Shem Mishmuel, when a boy becomes bar mitzvah, he experiences tremendous cheishek and geshmak – for his tefillin, for learning, for mitzvos. Then, that initial excitement wears off and he has to rebuild it himself.

A Gift from Hashem

The excitement of a new beginning, explains the Shem Mishmuel, is not just because it’s new – it’s because in the beginning stages Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives everything as a matanah. All the potential of all the greatness a person can achieve is given to him as a present at the beginning, which is why a bar mitzvah boy feels the cheishek and geshmak of a perfect person.

When a person gets married, he also has tremendous cheishek to change and do everything right. It’s a new beginning, a new creation, so Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives as a gift all the potential the person could get out of married life. The couple experiences those heights for the moment, and then it wears off and they have to rebuild it themselves. And the same holds true for every beginning: Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives an initial boost of potential, and then that potential has to be rebuilt gradually, throughout the person’s life.

This, continues the Shem Mishmuel, is what happened to Yaakov Avinu. Yaakov Avinu was greater than the malachim, but he reached that madreigah only later on, at the moment of וַיִּוָּתֵר יַעֲקֹב לְבַדּוֹ. Here in Parashas Vayeitzei, however, he wasn’t there yet. But there was one moment, early on in this parashah, when he was able to experience the level of וַיִּוָּתֵר יַעֲקֹב לְבַדּוֹ, and that was during the vision of the ladder.

During that vision, which was Yaakov’s initiation as one of the Avos of Klal Yisrael, Hakadosh Baruch Hu revealed to him the potential of Klal Yisrael’s future. At that moment, as a gift, Hashem gave Yaakov all of the potential perfection he could achieve, and he experienced it then as a baby inside its mother experiences the entire Torah. Subsequently, the vision disappeared, and Yaakov Avinu had to rebuild that potential by himself.

Therefore, says the Shem Mishmuel, when Yaakov experienced the vision of the ladder, there was a time when he was alone; the malachim of Eretz Yisrael had gone up and the malachim of chutz laaretz had not yet come down. But that was fine, because at that moment Yaakov experienced, as a gift, the potential of וַיִּוָּתֵר יַעֲקֹב לְבַדּוֹ, and he didn’t need the help of malachim. Only afterwards, when he reverted to his true madreigah and started the work of building himself up, did he need the protection of the malachim again.

At the end of this week’s parashah, Yaakov had not yet reached the madreigah ofוַיִּוָּתֵר יַעֲקֹב לְבַדּוֹ, and he still needed the constant protection of the malachim. When the passuk says: וַיִּקְרָא שֵׁם הַמָּקוֹם הַהוּא מַחֲנָיִם, it is conveying that both groups of malachim had to be present together in order to guarantee that Yaakov wouldn’t be left alone even for one moment.

We learn from this that when a person experiences a new beginning – perhaps Rosh Hashanah, or the beginning of a zman, or some other occasion – and he feels the tremendous geshmak and motivation to do the job right, that’s because it’s a time of “Bereishis,” when all the potential of what is to come is briefly revealed. It’s only natural, then, that after that beginning wears off somewhat, maintaining the original kabbalah becomes difficult, and now the person has to work to build back to his original level. There’s actually no reason that the initial cheishek should have been there – it was a present from Hashem, like the Torah taught to a baby before he was born.

At the time when we make a decision to improve ourselves, the feeling of inspiration we experience at that moment is a certain shleimus, which then wears off, leaving us to do the work of bringing to fruition the potential that was implanted in us from the beginning.

Right now, it is a mere six weeks since the Yamim Noraim and Succos – the beginning of the year and a new beginning for all of us – came to an end. At this point, when we might be feeling the his’chadshus wearing off, Parashas Vayeitzei teaches us that this is normal; it’s the way it’s meant to be.

True growth needs to happen from scratch, and it doesn’t make sense that the cheishek and shleimus should be there from the beginning. The real chiddush is actually the cheishek we experience at the outset, as a gift from Hashem.

Once we understand this common struggle, it’s much easier to deal with it and, with Hashem’s help, rebuild ourselves slowly but surely and reach the levels that we briefly experienced at the time of our original kabbalos.

In this week’s parashah we learn about Rochel Imeinu’s tremendous act of vitur in giving over the simanim to Leah. Leah would have endured terrible shame if Yaakov would have discovered that Lavan tricked him and switched Rochel for Leah, so Rochel forfeited the opportunity to become Yaakov’s first wife and yielded it to Leah.

As many point out, Rochel’s greatness was evident not only in her act of vitur, but also in the way she went about it. Later in the parashah, during the incident with the duda’im, Leah turns to Rochel and says: הַמְעַט קַחְתֵּךְ אֶת אִישִׁי וְלָקַחַת גַּם אֶת דּוּדָאֵי בְּנִי — it’s bad enough that you took my husband, you also want to take the duda’im? It seems clear that Leah didn’t even realize that it was actually Rochel who had allowed her to marry Yaakov first. This reflects the modesty with which Rochel performed her act of vitur.

The Midrash (Pesichah to Eichah Rabbah) teaches that this act is actually going to be the primary zechus that will bring Mashiach — and this is what Hakadosh Baruch Hu refers to when He tells Rochel: יֵשׁ שָׂכָר לִפְעֻלָּתֵךְ… וְיֵשׁ תִּקְוָה לְאַחֲרִיתֵךְ. The schar and the tikvah stem from Rochel’s noble deed of giving up the simanim to save Leah from embarrassment.

The Midrash describes in detail how each of the Avos, as well as Moshe Rabbeinu, tried to advocate on behalf of Klal Yisrael, but Hakadosh Baruch Hu did not accept any of their arguments. Only when Rochel came at the end and described how difficult it was for her to be mevater to Leah and not be jealous, and then asks Hakadosh Baruch Hu to have mercy on Klal Yisrael, did Hashem relent.

Rochel’s act was certainly a great one, but why is the zechus of this act superior to all the merits of Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaakov, and Moshe? What was so unique about it?

Rochel Imeinu’s Plea

The answer is apparent in the Midrash: While her act wasn’t necessarily greater than all the acts of the Avos and Moshe Rabbeinu, the nature of her act made it precisely the zechus to save Klal Yisrael from galus. The Midrash relates that Rochel argued before Hakadosh Baruch Hu, “I’m a person of flesh and blood, yet I was not jealous, and I brought and accepted a tzarah, a co-wife, in my house. If I could do that, then why should You, the King of the universe, be jealous of a tzarah in the form of an idol, that has no substance, being placed in the Beis Hamikdash?”

That argument struck a chord, prompting Hakadosh Baruch Hu to say, “If you were able to bring a tzarah into your life, then I’m willing to forgive and make room for this tzarah that Klal Yisrael brought into My house.”

How do we understand the middah k’neged middah here? Because Rochel was mevater to Leah and brought her into her house, Hakadosh Baruch Hu should be mevater on the avodah zarah?

The Maharal (Netzach Yisrael 34) raises this question, and explains that there is actually a deep connection between Rochel’s act and Hashem’s forgiving Klal Yisrael’s idolatry.

Rochel should really have been the akeres habayis; Yaakov loved her. Obviously, however, Leah also wanted to have Yaakov for herself, and she felt her husband belonged to her. Yet Rochel recognized that Hakadosh Baruch Hu created an imperfect world, a world of division and pirud — shniyos, in the Maharal’s terms. And she understood that for the twelve shevatim to come into existence, Yaakov needed to have more than one wife, representing different forces.

On the basis of this recognition, Rochel argued that Hakadosh Baruch Hu Himself has to acknowledge that this world is a world of division, which leads to dispute and lack of clarity, and that is what caused Klal Yisrael to stray after avodah zarah.

Since Rochel Imeinu was the one who unveiled this hanhagah of dealing with division, Hakadosh Baruch Hu accepted her argument and agreed to forgive and have mercy on Klal Yisrael.

The Difficulty of Vitur

I would like to better understand what the idea of shniyos means. What is this point that Rochel revealed?

I believe that the words of the Maharal yield a profound insight into how a person can come to an act of vitur. Many types of chessed are challenging, but vitur can present far greater difficulty. I have seen many baalei chessed who simply were not able to be mevater. The difference is that when a person does chessed, he feels a certain satisfaction, so his sense of self is nurtured. While chessed requires him to give up something, which is inherently difficult, the person feels good that he is giving.

That good feeling is absent in an act of vitur. A situation of vitur typically features a dispute over who is entitled to something, be it a yerushah, a mantle of leadership, a position, or even a seat in the beis midrash. The parties involved are fighting over justice — to whom does this rightfully belong? The person who is mevater often feels like a shmattah, as though his sense of self is totally smothered.

In chessed, a person’s sense of self is nourished by the fact that he’s giving, whereas in vitur the person feels that not only is he giving up what is supposed to be his, the other person actually thinks he is entitled to it! They’re arguing over justice!

Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave us our sense of self, and that sense of self has to be nourished. But how can a person nourish his sense of self in a dispute, so that he can muster the strength to be mevater?

Room for Division

The Midrash, and the Maharal, reveal to us what gave Rochel Imeinu the strength to perform her act of vitur. Trying to feed your sense of self by saying, “I’m going to feel good because I’m giving” is not going to work. To be mevater, a person has to go to a different pipeline and exercise a different one of his kochos hanefesh. He has to recognize that this is a world of shniyos, of division. Hakadosh Baruch Hu created the world with imperfections, with much confusion and pirud, and as a result of this division, people often view things differently. You see something one way, and your friend sees it the other way, so you enter a dispute. You think you’re a hundred percent right, but so does he. And he may very well be dead wrong, but his viewpoint is the result of the divisiveness in this world, which causes your opponent to see things in a distorted way.

The Maharal explains that this is the nature of the world. And if you understand that this is an imperfect world, then you recognize that the world has room for different viewpoints and pathways. By reaching this recognition, you are extending yourself tremendously — you’re not feeding your sense of self, you’re broadening it. You’re making room for a completely different way of seeing things, a different perspective that is the opposite of yours. It’s a recognition that the world is bigger than your small ani.

When someone is presented with challenge of vitur, often he gets caught up in trying to come to terms with the reasoning of the other person. But that’s not the right path to take, because if a person thinks justice is on his side, he’s never going to be able to justify the other person’s claim. Rather, he’s supposed to recognize that although middas hadin would dictate that this is the last thing that should be happening, in this imperfect world we need to make room for division, because that is part of Hashem’s ratzon. He wants there to be many paths in this world.

This is what Rochel Imeinu did.

She had no way of seeing how this situation was right. It didn’t make any sense that Leah should take her place. But she knew that the ratzon of Hakadosh Baruch Hu was that there should be twelve shevatim, and she understood that Hakadosh Baruch Hu wanted there to be tzaros, co-wives. And she made room for that division.

Rochel made room for something that, from her viewpoint, seemed wrong, because she accepted that this is a result of the world of pirud that Hashem created. Likewise, due to the division and murkiness of this world, Bnei Yisrael don’t recognize the unity of Hakadosh Baruch Hu, and they stray from Him. Rochel, through her act of vitur, was able to bring out a hanhagah in which Hakadosh Baruch Hu would make room for the outgrowth of Klal Yisrael’s division.

This is the depth of Rochel’s act, and from this we learn what a tremendous zechus it is when a person is able to be mevater. Specifically in our time, the Ikvesa d’Meshicha, this is what we all need – that Hakadosh Baruch Hu should show rachamim and make room for the pirud of our straying from Him. When we’re presented with a challenge of vitur, we have to raise ourselves up and extend ourselves, recognizing that this is a world of pirud.

We should all be zocheh to the time when Hakadosh Baruch Hu will hear the voice of Rochel —קוֹל בְּרָמָה נִשְׁמָע נְהִי בְּכִי תַמְרוּרִים רָחֵל מְבַכָּה עַל בָּנֶיהָ, and He will say: יֵשׁ שָׂכָר לִפְעֻלָּתֵךְ… וְיֵשׁ תִּקְוָה לְאַחֲרִיתֵךְ.

Gut Shabbos.

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