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Harav Hagaon Yehuda Wagshal Shlita

The Litmus Test of Middos

Parashas Vayeira

Harav Hagaon Yehuda Wagshal shlita

Avraham Avinu passed each of his ten nisyonos by utilizing and developing a particular middah. In the final nisayon, Akeidas Yitzchak, which middah did he utilize? There seems to be a contradiction in this regard. On one hand, at the beginning of this nisayon, the Torah says, וַיַּשְׁכֵּם אַבְרָהָם בַּבֹּקֶר וַיַּחֲבֹשׁ אֶת חֲמֹרוֹ — Avraham Avinu awoke early and saddled his donkey in preparation for the trip. Rashi notes that it wasn’t really appropriate for him to do this; how could a distinguished person like Avraham Avinu prepare his donkey by himself? Rashi answers: שהאהבה מקלקלת השורה. Avraham Avinu was so impassioned by his ahavas Hashem that he disregarded his own status and prestige: It’s time to perform the Akeidah — let’s go! This makes it sound as though Avraham Avinu utilized the middah of ahavah in performing the Akeidah.

On the other hand, at the end of the Akeidah, a malach came and told Avraham Avinu, אַל תִּשְׁלַח יָדְךָ אֶל הַנַּעַר וְאַל תַּעַשׂ לוֹ מְאוּמָּה כִּי עַתָּה יָדַעְתִּי כִּי יְרֵא אֱלֹקִים אַתָּה. This implies that the nisayon of the Akeidah required the middah of yirah.

Was the Akeidah a nisayon of ahavah, then, or a nisayon of yirah?

A One-Track Mind

In discussing the Akeidah, the Orchos Tzaddikim explains that Avraham Avinu fulfilled this nisayon with the middah of ahavah, as derived from the passuk, וַיַּשְׁכֵּם אַבְרָהָם בַּבֹּקֶר וַיַּחֲבֹשׁ אֶת חֲמֹרוֹ, which conveys that Avraham Avinu went to the Akeidah with zerizus.

But what is the passuk telling us? That Avraham Avinu wasn’t lazy? I think it’s obvious that Avraham Avinu wasn’t lazy.

The Orchos Tzaddikim says that the Torah is telling us: Don’t think that when Avraham Avinu fulfilled this nisayon of the Akeidah he was conflicted. We might have thought that Avraham Avinu faced an inner struggle — on one hand, he wanted to fulfill Hashem’s command to offer Yitzchak as a korban, but on the other hand, this was his beloved son, for whom he had waited so long. Furthermore, Yitzchak represented Avraham Avinu’s whole future, everything he had taught was going to be transmitted onward through him— and now, suddenly, Hashem wanted him to shecht him? In our minds, this would seem to pose a major conflict — on one hand, ahavas Hashem, and on the other hand, love for Yitzchak. And the way we understand it, Avraham Avinu was misgaber and he managed to place his ahavas Hashem first, ahead of his love for Yitzchak.

This is a mistake, the Orchos Tzaddikim teaches. For if that would have been the way Avraham Avinu passed the test of the Akeidah, then this would not have been done with zerizus. Zerizus is not merely a matter of not being lazy. When a person is focused, with a one-track mind, on what he needs to do, then he does it b’zerizus. But when a person feels conflicted, then even if he manages to overcome his reluctance and does end up doing the right thing, the conflict will cause him to procrastinate, and he’ll end up carrying out the task without zerizus.

When the Torah says that Avraham Avinu performed the Akeidah with zerizus, it is informing us that Avraham Avinu did not experience any inner conflict. His passionate ahavas Hashem completely overtook him and he didn’t even think about his son.

Zerizus, then, means being one-track minded — because when a person is one-track minded, he acts b’zerizus.

But if the Akeidah involved the middah of ahavah, as Rashi and the Orchos Tzaddikim teach, how do we understand the passuk אַל תִּשְׁלַח יָדְךָ אֶל הַנַּעַר וְאַל תַּעַשׂ לוֹ מְאוּמָּה כִּי עַתָּה יָדַעְתִּי כִּי יְרֵא אֱלֹקִים אַתָּה, which implies that the Akeidah involved the middah of yirah?

Perhaps we can answer as follows.

Rashi says that there was a conversation going on here between Avraham Avinu and the malach. When the malach told Avraham, אַל תִּשְׁלַח יָדְךָ אֶל הַנַּעַר, Avraham made a shocking statement: “If you don’t let me shecht him, then why did I come here? This whole nisayon was a waste! Let me at least draw a bit of blood from Yitzchak by making a small cut, to make it worth my while.”

In response, the malach said “No, אַל תַּעַשׂ לוֹ מְאוּמָּה — don’t even make a scratch on Yitzchak.”

And Avraham Avinu obeyed. Even though he so passionately desired to fulfill Hashem’s command, when Hashem said no, he stopped short and did nothing.

That’s yirah.

That’s what the words עַתָּה יָדַעְתִּי כִּי יְרֵא אֱלֹקִים אַתָּה refer to.

The Akeidah itself was a nisayon of ahavah. But when Avraham Avinu stopped short at the end of the Akeidah because Hashem told him to, that was an expression of yirah.

The Proof of Mastering a Middah

We might wonder: If the nisayon of the Akeidah was one of ahavah, then why did Hashem add this element of yirah at the end, while Avraham Avinu was expressing his middah of ahavah?

We can derive a fundamental lesson from here. Rav Hutner, in Maamarei Pachad Yitzchak, teaches an important rule regarding middos: We can tell whether a person genuinely possesses a particular good middah only if the person knows how not to use that middah. For example, anavah is a wonderful middah, but a person might be an anav simply because that’s his nature; he simply doesn’t think highly of himself, so he keeps a low profile. Some people naturally possess the middah of gaavah, while the default state of others is to be humble. That natural humility is not the middah of anavah.

Anavah is a middah, which you apply when necessary, according to what the Torah requires. The word middah can also mean a garment, as in the phrase וְלָבַשׁ הַכֹּהֵן מִדּוֹ בַד וּמִכְנְסֵי בַד, because a middah is like a garment: It’s something a person puts on and takes off. A middah is not just a natural tendency that a person possesses; it’s something that he decides when to use and when not to use.

If you want to know whether a person truly possesses the middah of anavah, you can discern that only when you see that he knows when and how not to be an anav. In general, we are instructed to be exceedingly humble — מאד מאד הוי שפל רוח — but in one area we are not supposed to be humble, and that is avodas Hashem. A person should not feel, Ah, I’m so small, I can’t do it, I can’t do anything. On the contrary, with regard to avodas Hashem, we are supposed to believe in ourselves, which is an application of the middah of gaavah: וַיִּגְבַּהּ לִבּוֹ בְּדַרְכֵי ה’.

A person who knows how to apply the middah of gaavah when necessary and utilize the middah of anavah the rest of the time is a true anav.

The same applies to all other good middos: Only when a person knows how and when to use the middah’s opposite can he be said to possess that middah.

To Give, or Not to Give?

The Hagahos Maimoni at the end of Hilchos Megillah conveys the same principle regarding the middah of chessed and tzedakah. Any person who does chessed or gives tzedakah is fulfilling a mitzvah. But there’s also a middah of chessed and a middah of tzedakah.

Let’s say a person donates large sums of money to tzedakah. Does that mean he possesses the middah of tzedakah? It depends, says the Hagahos Maimoni. If he also spends excessively on giving to other, ridiculous causes, then he’s just an extravagant person, not a baal tzedakah. A true baal tzedakah is someone who can give money generously for tzedakah, but knows how to exercise restraint and not give to unimportant causes. His restraint is what proves that he possesses the middah of tzedakah.

The mitzvah of tzedakah can be fulfilled regardless, but the middah of tzedakah is determined only if the person is capable of holding back when necessary.

The same applies to the middah of ahavas Hashem. If there’s no boundary of yirah to the person’s passionate love of Hashem, then he cannot be said to possess the middah of ahavas Hashem. Ahavah can only be discerned when it is utilized only at the correct time — and not utilized when the situation does not call for it. Excessive ahavah, without boundaries, indicates that the person is naturally passionate, not that he has ahavas Hashem. Only when the person knows how to say no, and rein in his ahavah, does he possess real ahavas Hashem.

Perhaps this explains why the Akeidah, which was essentially a nisayon of ahavah, had to end with an element of yirah. Avraham Avinu was called upon to develop and express his middah of ahavas Hashem, and, as the Orchos Tzaddikim says, his passion to fulfill Hashem’s command overrode his concern for his son. But Hakadosh Baruch Hu wanted to bring Avraham Avinu’s middah of ahavah to perfection, by having him demonstrate that he was not merely a passionate, enthusiastic person who channeled his passion towards doing Hashem’s will — he also knew when to say no and hold back that passion. When Hakadosh Baruch Hu said אַל תַּעַשׂ לוֹ מְאוּמָּה, Avraham stopped short. That yirah, that עַתָּה יָדַעְתִּי כִּי יְרֵא אֱלֹקִים אַתָּה, proved that Avraham Avinu had attained shleimus in the middah of ahavah.

In working on our middos, we need to know that every good middah needs to be used at the right times, and not used at the wrong times. That’s the real tikkun hamiddos, and the true test of a baal middos.

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